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Heal

by Crossed Hands

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1.
I've tried not to compare myself This is a step I've done in my emancipation from Conditions and values which shaped my youth I've been buried by the bricks of my own foundations Here lies a light for you and I If we consent to live without any consideration If only we could push ourselves out from our primary shapes From now, we're so afraid to comprehend the difference Our vices are vessels of what we try to hide The insight of our inner weaknesses Our vices are vessels of what we try to hide The insight of our inner weaknesses So feel free to emancipate from all the pieces of hope we try to keep In which we don't believe anymore We are the vessels of our dreams, like pulsations in our skin If only wisdom was a simple word, connected by the rhythm We cannot bring back our innocence, but sometimes ignorance will build castles in the sand As a remembrance of joy We can't bring back our innocence, but sometimes ignorance will build castles in the sand As a souvenir of joy, we are the vessels of our dreams Like pulsations in our skin Like pulsations in our skin
2.
There is There is a need to comprehend There is There is a need There is a need to self destruct Dismantle, brick by brick our foundations I live with the shadow of yours I wish I could reconnect myself to you There is There is a need to comprehend There is a love There is a love Dismantle, brick by brick our foundations I live with the shadow of yours But I wish I could reconnect myself to you There is There is a need to comprehend There is There is a need There is a need to self destruct
3.
This house is a window on my family’s decay A crumbling epitaph erected by myself In the memory of what lies inside the empty rooms A mere reflection of our desecravity I still remember the days I've spent in my sister's faded ruins The traces of her passage are binded by these wall The self-inflicted poison running through her veins She carved a personal prison where she locked herself She sells and resells every little piece of her materiality Rotten by the flames of distress I couldn't measure the magnitude Of her mental injury Too young to take responsibility for my mother's defeat My father put a veil before his eyes and ran away Leaving my mother to take charge of our dissociation We've been living in our rat caves And when she was seeking for an ear She found herself standing before the closed window The echoes The echoes of her call collides It collides against our indifference Our indifference This house is a window on my family’s decay A crumbling epitaph erected by myself In the memory of what lies inside the empty rooms A mere reflection of our desecravity
4.
Relics 03:01
My mother gave me birth in december ninety four An unplanned pregnancy for a woman lost in doubt Emerging from her wombs as an unexpected love I was nearly human: a life they could discard Mother, father Would your lives be the same without my existence Am I a disposable son or the latest relic of a buried love Was I a blessing or a curse for a couple in disguise But now I must remove myself from My parents’s creation Bludgeoning these pages with dolorous words Could not resolve or replace the past But it's okay, I'll take away the grief Mother, father Would your lives be the same without my existence Am I a disposable son or the latest relic of a buried love
5.
6.
I see myself before the coffin Revealing my own destruction within. I thought I would find peace Into the void In the absence of any feelings I found me dead, rotting in my angst Bathing in my hubris, Is that what I want for me My head is a dangerous place where I want to feel numb My envisions consume me Enfolds me in my own dimension If only I could take the time to look To see what's around my own design My own design (my own design) Is wasting my life (wasting my life) My own design (my own design) Ruining my sight (ruining my sight) Before the coffin, beneath the flow My mental health will take no more consideration Incinerate the negative inside my head
7.
Do you know what it's like to be on the other side There's a thin line between us and all the odd things we carry inside From the hall of desire, we can't decide Despite needs, the void is what's inside You despise your love for the life we have shared You’re thinking too much to care about what we're living And what our feelings would really mean (really mean) (would really mean) (would really mean) Do you know what it's like to be on the other side There's a thin line between us and all the odd things we carry inside From the hall of desire, we can't decide Despite needs, this void is what's inside My body is a shell and you will see The ocean drippin' down the hole This is the mark of your absence There is no antidote to soothe my ailments
8.
Time consumes me until I expel my flesh And if my bones remain, who will bless my name I feel the dagger swimming beneath my skin Each of my choices implies a part of me I cannot reclaim I cannot recover Just see We are somewhere in between Stunned by the “tic – tic”of our own abstraction So I replace myself and salt the wounds, facing my reality I worth the value I carry I am possessed by my possessions And time consumes me until I expel my flesh And if my bones remain, who will bless my name Blessing my name Dear « C » I know you've tried endlessly to fix your lack of fantasy Tried every kind of medicine to ease your spirituality I know it's hard to dialogue without the voice inside your head How long does it take to feel safe To feel safe I feel it I feel it inside The dagger The dagger of self-doubt I feel it I feel it inside Corrupting my celestial haze Corrupting My celestial haze
9.
She took refuge in a cardboard box but it will never shape a home Just a hole in her chest My mother wants to let it go, but she's like me She fears of being left alone And then two children bloomed in her crib She suddenly regains the innocence she lacked to fill her cracks She lives again through the heart of another She tries to fit but she cannot find a place But she's like me Oh, she's like me Mom, are you as scared as I am Or is it just another phase Will you decide to let it go But your abnegation will never release the agony Through the obsolescence of your will We've lost the link I am so sorry for being silent I am afraid to let it blow Because it could be my last, before the crash Too bad I love you
10.
Heal 04:50
Heal me Ease me
11.
« Mom » poured from the mouth of the child She told her « If your love is mine, my love is yours » She feels alive When they're alone At home But now It's gone She counts The wounds Of a love she left behind « Mom » falling from the lips of the children, She said to them « Mommy's busy, go play outside » She feels ashamed by all this mess She won't forget the words you said The way you used to love me first More than yourself, I won't forget I won’t forget I won’t forget

credits

released September 7, 2022

Recorded, Mixed & Produced at Heartsick Studios
Mastered by Bandit Studios

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about

Crossed Hands Paris, France

Crossed Hands
Melodic Hardcore
band from Paris, France, since 2015.

Clément Simiand
Jeremy Lhomme
Chad Menu
Pierre Cantin

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